War

The Gungans approached Theed head on,
Darth Maul said, “This must be a con.
They try to deceive,
There’s a trick up their sleeve,
I wouldn’t put it past a Jedi like Qui Gon.

The Viceroy said, “Shall we proceed?”
“Wipe them all out,” Sidious agreed.
So the Federation tanks
Formed up their ranks
And thus started the battle for Theed.

The Gungans started up their energy shield
Two armies faced each other cross the field.
And then the entire
Droid Army opened fire,
But the Gungan defenses didn’t yield.

Meanwhile outside Theed’s main hangar,
The Naboo, with indignant anger,
Stormed their way in
Slicing soldiers of tin
Into spare parts of disheartened languor.

The Nemoidians watched on a screen
The unfolding hangar battle scene.
“The battle’s so near!”
Said Nute, hiding fear.
Darth Maul left to go confront the Queen.

On the plain, the droid tanks ceased fire.
A new tactic they would require
The Gungans were floored
To see an infinite horde
Of robots marching down to the mire.

The droids were ordered to charge.
The Gungans eyeballs got large
They fired a shower
of balls made of power
That made the droids spark and discharge.

Next time: Anakin Stays Put

The Battle Plan

“We’ve located the ship,” Gunray said,
To Sidious’s floating hologram head.
“Her move is too bold,
But let it unfold.
Keep an eye on her and don’t be misled.”

The Queen and her new found comrade
Wrote out battle plans on an old scratch pad.
Jar Jar practically floated
When he was promoted,
“Weesa maken you General (Bombad)!”

The plan was to draw the droids out
To the Gungan army for a direct bout.
Then a group of Naboo
Would try to sneak through
And capture Mr. Viceroy Sans Snout.

“The Gungans might take a great loss,”
Said Qui Gon, looking out across.
“We’re not faint of heart.
We will do our part.”
Said the giant Gungan named Boss.

“If we can free a few pilots en route
We could launch some small ships in pursuit.
With the control ship destroyed,
Their communication would be void,
And the battle droids wouldn’t know who to shoot.

Qui Gon said, “This plan is well thought out
But in order to bring it about
We HAVE to catch Nute,
And your fighters MUST shoot
Through the shields of the control ship, no doubt.

Next time: War

Enter Darth Maul

In a conference call with the Sith Lord
The Neimoidian commanders were implored
“Viceroy, find that ship,
I don’t want any lip.
Don’t leave any location unexplored.”


“But sir, they are out of our range.
And we think their destination has changed.”
“Then effective forthwith
This is a job for a Sith!
Meet my apprentice, he has horns and he’s strange.”


The hologram faded and closed.
Nute Gunray was neither cool or composed.
“I think we will rue this,
Now there are TWO Sith!”
If the Jedi find out, then we’re hosed!”


Meanwhile on the ship from Naboo,
Amidala was commending Artoo
The Queen gave a royal
“My, aren’t you loyal?”
And bid Artoo Deetoo adieu.


The Jedi and the Queen then made a plan
On what they would do when they land.
The Captain from Theed
Said he disagreed
Tatooine was crawling with Hutts and sand.


Next time: Tatooine

Welcome to Theed

Meanwhile, up on the surface in Theed,

To the Federation, Naboo did concede.

Nute Gunray looked mean

As he said, "Heya, Queen…

I’ve got a new contract for you to read!”

“What a waste of time for you to pen it,

I’m sure it will be laughed out of the Senate.”

Said the Queen to old Nute,

The man with no snoot.

And you’d better believe that she meant it.

“Take these prisoners out of my sight.”

Shouted Nute Gunray, irked by the queen’s spite.

Elsewhere, out on the bay,

Coming to save the day

A bongo with a Gungan and two Jedi Knights.

The droids marched their prisoners single file

“This will be easy!” Qui Gon smiled.

They jumped down from above,

And applied a Force shove

And reduced the droid soldiers to a pile.

Introductions were made all around.

They determined a ship must be found.

It caused great grief

To the Security chief

For the danger to the Queen Naboo crowned.

Queen Amidala agreed that she must go.

To the Senate this treachery she'd show.
With the Senators’ backing

She’d send Gunray packing

And again Naboo’s trade routes would flow.

Into the hangar, the gallant group strode

Through the droid army, the two Jedi mowed.

They all got on the ship

And they started their trip

To Coruscant, the Senate’s abode.

Next time: Getting Past the Blockade

The Queen Makes Some Calls

A young queen with painted dots on her cheeks
Contacted the Trade Federations’ sheiks
“You will soon be made
To end this blockade.”
She informed the Neimoidian freaks.


“We don’t know what you are talking about,”
Said Nute Gunray, a cowardly being sans snout,
“You look very regal
But, our boycott is legal,
And the Senate will approve it, no doubt.”


As soon as the Queen hung up the phone
And the Neimoidians were sure they were alone, 
Nute said, “Now is the time
For our nefarious crime,
C’mon, we’ve a queen to dethrone.


Meanwhile on the planet Naboo,
The Queen tried to put a call through
To Coruscant’s Chancellor
But the Federation cancelled her.
Communications planet wide were askew.


“They don’t get any message we’re sending
We must defend from the invasion impending,”
Said the queen’s top advisor.
Nobody was wiser
But the queen favored olive branch extending.

Next time: Meet Jar Jar Binks...