Monday, May 30, 2011

Interrogation

After bandaging Zam Wesell’s arm
And threatening no further harm,
He then questioned the con,
“After who have you gone?”
But Zam Wesell did not buy his charm.

“Tell me who are you working for, now!”
Said Anakin, with a angry eyebrow.
“A bounty hunter called...Juuuuuuhhh.”
Anakin replied “Huh?”
Wesell died, but the question was, how?

Then a WHOOSH as a jetpack took flight
Up above dissapearing from sight.
Obi Wan, being smart,
Looked and found a small dart
In the neck of the lifeless Clawdite.

Next time: Anakin's Solo Assignment

Toxic Dart

Sunday, May 29, 2011

The Bar

Obi Wan then did enter the bar
And before he had gone very far
A dude with antennae...
or dreadlocks in henna?
Offered death sticks...whatever they are.

The Jedi just gestured his hand
For a trick the weak minded can’t stand
“You don’t want to sell this,”
He said, trying to dismiss.
And the weird dude repeated the command.

“Now go home and rethink your life, man”
The dude left from the bar, nay, he ran,
To go home and rethink.
Obi threw back a drink,
And he gave the rough bar a quick scan.

He sensed trouble which quickly he found.
I sensed Wesell and whipped right around.
He slashed with his sword
And then Zam Wesell roared,
‘Cuz her hand was now found on the ground.

Quickly Anakin rushed to his side,
Told the patrons, “We Jedi preside.
Go back to your beer,
Not a thing to see here.”
Then the Jedi took Wesell outside.

Next time: Interrogation

Vandor Star Wars Glasses, Set of 4

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Crash Landing

Hand to hand Zam and Anakin fought
Til a hole in the floorboard was shot
Spinning out of control
As the fight took its toll
They crashed in a nightlife hotspot.

Zam Wesell ran off through a door
Obi Wan caught up just before
His padawan gave chase,
Obi slowed up his pace,
He had Anakin’s sword to restore.

“The assassin’s a changeling,” said Ani.
As he dusted the dust from his fanny.
“And I’ve cause to suspect
That the person who wrecked,
Is a woman, mid-twenties, not a granny.”

Kenobi advised they slow down.
He’d teach patience and care to this clown.
“I’ve a feeling you’ll be
The death of ol’ me,”
Said the dry Jedi Knight with a frown.

“I’m trying my best,” said the younger,
Hardly hiding his hankering hunger,
To get in and find ‘er
And shackle and bind ‘er
And send this assassin down under.

“Go get her,” Obi said with a wink.
“But be careful and please try to think.”
His young pupil was glowing
And asked, “Where you going?”
Obi Wan answered, “I need a drink.”

Next time: The Bar

Friday, May 27, 2011

Midair Struggle

Zam was startled to see a new rider
And then slammed on the brakes of the glider.
Ani flew to the front
Where he slammed with a grunt
...For a second Zam looked like a spider?

We will find that this Zam can disguise.
His face, as a Clawdite, defies
All laws of reason
To fit any season.
A shapeshifter loves to surprise.

So then Zam drew a gun and opened fire
Which ignited Ani’s sword and his ire.
The hero, so dashing
Proceeded with slashing
Until he dropped his light saber. Bad squire!

So with Skywalker’s sword in midair
Obi Wan made a nice flying snare.
He’d have words for Ani later,
About trying to take greater
Precautions with his Jedi hardware.

Next time: Crash Landing

Thursday, May 26, 2011

The Chase is On

“What took you so long?” Obi grilled,
Upset at almost getting killed.
“You want to hitchhike?
Couldn’t find one I like,”
Replied Ani,  you could tell he was thrilled.

“My young padawan best bite his lips
And should work with his sword, not his quips.”
With Skywalker driving,
His ego was thriving
As after Zam Wesell he zips.

He drove like a bat out of hell.
Obi Wan wasn’t feeling so well.
“I don’t think you like flying,”
Said Anakin, sighing.
“Flying?! It’s suicide. Farewell!”

Obi Wan was coming unsnapped
Ani flew through an arc and got zapped.
For a moment seemed they’d lost’er
But Anakin regained his posture
Took a shortcut t’was perfectly mapped.

“Excuse me,” Anakin quipped.
Obi Wan thought his Padawan had flipped,
For he jumped o’er the side
And with gravity defied,
Landed on Wesell’s ride, (which he gripped).

Next time: Midair Struggle

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones - Original Motion Picture Soundtrack

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

A Wild Ride

The bugs were ‘bout ready to bite
Poor Padme who slept through the night.
Lucky Anakins’ saber
Cut the worm... and his neighbor
And Padme was saved. Yay! Alright!

The droid was still hovering outside.
Obi Wan took no time to decide.
He was risking his...mass
As he jumped through the glass
And he took the bad droid for a ride.

As the droid carried Obi away
Down the Coruscant floating highway
Ani stormed the garage
And found a hodgepodge
Of fine speeders, but where’s the valet?

Obi Wan, hanging on real tight
Had a sweet birdseye view of the night
The droid did its best
To get rid of its guest
Giving Obi a turbulent flight.

Zam Wesell saw the droid’s botched return
And decided it was time it did burn.
She picked up her gun
And the droid’s days were done
In a fiery explosion, nocturne!

Obi Wan fell through space like a brick
Through traffic a hundred levels thick,
Until caught by a speeder
And I tell you, dear reader
That poor Obi was shocked and airsick.

Next time: The Chase Is On



Star Wars E3 BF12 OBI-WAN KENOBI

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Dreams Interrupted

“I’ve been having bad dreams,” Ani said.
“My mother is haunting my head.”
“These dreams will pass soon,
Even we aren’t immune
To our feelings which can be misread.”

While they talked, a small window appeared
Loud enough that Artoo woke and peered
A quick look around
It appeared safe and sound
So he switched off again...I know...weird.

Centipedes then proceeded to enter
While Ani conversed with his mentor.
They discussed politics
The mistrust it inflicts,
While the bugs inched their way t’wards the center.

Artoo woke up and shreiked in alarm.
The two bugs were now up Padme’s arm.
The Jedi sensed trouble
And they ran on the double
To keep Amidala from harm.

Next time: A Wild Ride

Monday, May 23, 2011

Stakeout

Mace and Yoda traversed down a hall.
They were trying to make sense of it all.
The Dark Side was growing
And the Jedi weren’t knowing
Why the Light Side was starting to pall.

Meanwhile Anakin stood watching guard
Though his line of clear sight had been barred.
Padme hindered his view
But she programmed Artoo
To warn Ani if the going got hard.

When the Senator had gone to bed
Obi Wan kept no secrets and said,
“You can’t use her as bait
That was not our mandate
We should tighten security instead.”

Calmly Anakin said, “Relax, man.
Through the Force I can sense better than
Any sensor we’ve got.
Though that astro robot
Is now doing a perimeter scan.”

Little did they know that outside
A small probe gave two creatures a ride
It was making its way
To a sleeping Padme,
(T’was the worms that Jango supplied.)

Next time: Dreams Interrupted

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Assasins Plot Again

The young one was kinda bummed out.
He in fact even started to pout.
“Thought of her every day,
She just thinks I’m okay,
Did you see that? What’s that all about?”

Jar Jar said that Padme was happy.
Obi Wan told him not to get sappy.
“Padawan, please don’t sob
Let us just do our job.
Check security and make it snappy.”

Across town way up high on a ledge
Was some scum, the worst kind you could dredge.
Jango Fett and Zam Wesell
In a hovering vessel
Were making a murderous pledge.

Jango handed Zam Wesell a jar
With some centipedes, dire and bizarre.
As Zam took the cup,
Fett said, “Don’t mess this up,
Amidala must not win this war.”

Next time: Stakeout


Star Wars: Episode 2 > Zam Wesell with Face Reveal Action Action Figure

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Learn Your Place, Padawan

“I don’t need a chaperone who’s protective.
What really would like is a detective
To find out who is trying
To blow me up and make me dying
I think that should really be your main objective.”

Obi Wan reminded her their charter,
To prevent her from becoming a martyr.
But Anakin promised more
He said he’d mop the floor
With the assassin’s face and then once again…even harder.

“We will not exceed our mandate, young padawan!”
Was the stern rebuke that came from Obi Wan.
“Keeping her from harm
From evil gendarme
Not investigating hither and yon!”

“This assasin is Padme’s vexing specter,
By hunting him down, we’d protect her.”
Anakin argued
In a way that did intrude
On Obi Wan’s role as the duo’s director.

“Anakin, you will follow my lead.
Your britches’ capacity you exceed,”
Obi did decry,
But Anakin asked, “Why?”
As Jedi, their presence was overkill indeed.

“We will follow the instructions from Mace
And you will remember your place.”
Said Obi to his student
Trying to be prudent.
Padme intervened with diplomatic grace.

”Perhaps by your mere presence you’ll uncover
This mysterious cloud that doth hover”
And with that reprieve,
The Senator took her leave,
And Anakin thought, “Man, I love her.”

Next time: The Assassins Plot Again

Friday, May 20, 2011

Old Friends Reunited

Wanting to protect, not offend,
The Jedi assigned an old friend,
To watch after Padme
The two person cadre
Of Obi Wan and Anakin they’d send.

Coincidentally, those two appeared
And my friends, it was just as I feared
He used to be small
But now Anakin was tall
And Obi Wan had grown himself a beard.

Obi Wan had picked up an odd sense
That Anakin was growing more tense.
His face went all flush
Because of his crush,
Obi Wan laughed at Anakin’s expense.

“Here goes nothing,” Anakin thinks.
The door opened and there was Mr. Binks!
Upon seeing Kenobi,
He yells, “Obi Obi Obi!”
Then he looks at Anakin and he blinks.

“And you must be who?” Jar Jar begins...
“OH! He’s so big! Its Anakins!”
He gives a big hug,
And with a sheepish mug,
Says, “Shesa waitin...come on ins.”

The Gungan entered, smiling ear to ear.
Cleared his throat and announced, “Looks who’s here!”
Amidala and Obi greeted
And then she was treated
To an awkward compliment from Ani, though sincere.

She laughed it off, called him “little boy”
Anakin blushed, but it gave Obi and Typho joy.
“You won’t notice us here,”
Said Obi-Wan, lest she fear,
That the Jedi would be meddlesome and annoy.

Next time: Learn Your Place Padawan

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Palpatine and the Jedi

So the real Amidala lived to fight another day
And Captain Typho safely whisked her away.
In the next scene
We find Palpatine
Meeting with a Jedi soiree.

“At some point it will come to a vote,”
Said the Chancellor, who then seemed to gloat.
“I won’t let this be,
They must listen to me,
I won’t let the Separatists sink my boat.”

Mace Windu, (who wore no hairpiece),
Said, “The Jedi are keepers of peace.
If the Separatists defect,
We’re too few to protect
You would need extra troops for police.

“Master Yoda, will it really come to war?”
Chancellor Palpatine did implore.
“The Dark Side clouds me
So impossible to see
So I can’t really say any more.”

A buzzing sound informed the group
Of the arrival of Amidala’s troop
After greetings were passed,
The Senator asked,
“This assasination attempt, what’s the scoop?”

They had hunches but not for sure who...
Amidala said, “I think it’s Count Dooku.”
This caused some surprise
But in the Jedi’s eyes
Dooku was not evil, just cuckoo.

Then the talk took a serious inflection,
Palpatine made a most wise suggestion.
Against Padme’s will
He insisted still
That she be placed under Jedi protection.

Next time: Old Friends Reunited

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Opening Crawl

I’m back from whereabouts unknowns
Called by popular demand (and some groans).
I did some writing while I was gone,
And now the story must go on,
So welcome to part two, “Attack of the Clones”.

Years passed since the events on Theed.
The Republic had some wanting to secede.
They sure meant it
And told the Senate,
“We’re splitting so we can get what we need.”

The Separatists made peace unsure.
And not everything had a Jedi cure.
And it’s worth noting
The Senate was voting
On whether or not an army to procure.

Amidala, the Queen of Naboo,
Is now a Senator in Episode Two
So amid all this din
Is where we’ll begin,
Over Coruscant, her ship comes into view.

Two Naboo fighters escorted her down
To the landing platform high above town
The fighter pilots disembarked
And one of them remarked,
“I guess there was no danger,” with a frown.

No sooner had Captain Typho spoken
The silence of the moment was broken
The “danger” that he boded
Manifested and exploded
As a bomb caused a-screamin’ and a-croakin’.

The Senator sunk down to the ground
And she died as everyone gathered ‘round
But the person in the rubble
Was actually a stunt double,
Amidala was the other pilot, everyone found.

Next Time: Palpatine and the Jedi

Monday, May 16, 2011

Galactic Empire Times

This one was forwarded to me from my buddy David, thanks D.C.!

Newspaper article describing the Empire's "catching" of Obi Wan Kenobi. Some of the funniest parts are in the reader comments.

Click here for the story

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Saturday, May 14, 2011

This guy owns his own R2 unit!

http://sennasr2d2.blogspot.com/

"This exact working replica was built by Michael Senna in 2003. It made more than 100 appearances in its first 4 years, including mostly charity events, as well as conventions, promotional events and TV appearances. R2-D2 spreads joy everywhere he goes, to people of all ages! "








Star Wars 6" IR RC Clone Wars R2D2

Friday, May 13, 2011

Generation Star Wars: Jar Jar Binks Salad

I've been enjoying this Generation Star Wars blog lately. Here's one of the posts from a couple of years ago...

Generation Star Wars: Jar Jar Binks Salad: "A side dish from the Dark Side: Sculpt Jar Jar Binks out of a root vegetable. "

A Word About Limericks - The Basics

I had a blast writing that first volume of limericks, based on Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. It might not be a literary gem on par with Dickinson or Frost, or even Silverstein for that matter, but I'm happy with my first effort. One of the benefits of tackling a huge project like limerickizing Star Wars is that now I have five more movies to improve on my writing.

6,748 words, 210 stanzas, and 35 blog entries later, I think it is time to learn how to write a limerick. (I've just been winging it so far.) From my experiences and lessons learned over the past month, I've put together a series of posts to discuss the topic of writing limericks. You might already know the basics, but just in case, in this first post of the series, let me back up a bit...

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Generation Star Wars: Troops of Doom

I'm going to take a short break with the limericks before starting on Attack of the Clones. But keep checking in, I'll be sharing random Star Wars stuff and I'll start with the limericks again on May 18th.

In the meantime, enjoy this:
Kinda makes me wish I had kept my Star Wars figures. This looks fun!

Generation Star Wars: Troops of Doom: "Kraig Furtado's free web comic Troops of Doom chronicles G.I. Joe versus Star Wars in a battle for control of LEGO technology and the galaxy..."

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The End!

So the game seemed to be up for Nute and Rune
Even with powerful ties, they weren’t immune.
Amadala gave up their custody
To Palpatine and trusted he
Would see them brought to justice in front of tribune.

Congratulations then were passed around
Palpatine had political power newly found
He promised not to cease
Working for galactic peace
Palpatine knew how to project an assuring sound.

Yoda then conferred with Obi-Wan
The possibility that Ani was the Chosen One
“You are now a Jedi Knight
But I still don’t think it’s right
For you to take Ani as your padawan.

That night they gathered for a funeral pyre,
And Qui Gon Jin’s lifeless body was set afire.
Yoda and Mace talked myth
Regarding the ancient Sith
Always two there were, a master and a squire.

The next day the Naboo had a great parade
To celebrate the Gungan friends they made
Gathered side by side
The whole cast smiled and sighed
Including Anakin, sporting a padawan braid!

And now the whole story is through
Wait, I guess that might not be true.
Although I’m done
Retelling Episode One
Next up is Episode Two!

Coming next...Attack of the Clones!


Star Wars: The Complete Saga (Episodes I-VI) [Blu-ray]

Monday, May 9, 2011

Victory!

Keeping his promise to Qui Gon to stay seated,
Ani’s starfighter was reposed and overheated.
Indicators of red
Meant the systems were dead
But Artoo was working as he whistled and tweeted.

A  Battle Droid strode up, “Where’s your pilot?”
Artoo replied (in droid), “Dude, I fly it.”
Battle Droid said, “Funny,
Now show me some ID.”
The indicators turned green, so Ani tried it.

One button press fired a laser blast
And mowed down the enemy that had amassed.
Ani wanted more
”What’s this other button for?”
So he pressed it and two torpedoes whistled past.

Torpedoes missed the droids and went astray.
“I missed Artoo, now lets fly away.”
But he forgot to factor
The ship’s main reactor
His accidental target saved the day!

But now there was no time to wait.
The command ship was in a serious state.
Without any dawdle
Ani hit the throttle
And escaped just as it did detonate.

With the command ship blown into bits,
The droid army lost all it’s wits.
When the fireball appeared
The Gungans all cheered
And the robots all fell down and called it quits.

When Ani and Artoo reached the ground
They were unaware at the fame they’d found
The other pilots were eyeing
This boy of superb flying
He didn’t understand why they gathered ‘round.

Next time: The End
Star Wars Episode I Action Fleet - Naboo Starfighter Featuring Anakin Skywalker

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Tides Turned

Another “queen” appeared at the door.
The Neimoidians’ jaws hit the floor.
“Get her!” Nute cried
But pursuit did divide
As half the droids after her tore.

“Your queen will not escape,” Gunray bragged.
Down in her chair Amidala sagged
A secret drawer opens
Where she’s hidden some guns
And soon the rest of the droids are bagged.

Nute realized that he had been burned.
The tides of this skirmish had turned.
But if he could delay,
More droids would come this way
And then his control would be returned.

As soon as the ray shields unlit
Obi Wan attacked with vengeance and grit
He fought with great vigor
But Maul’s vigor was bigger
And he knocked Obi Wan down a pit.

Darth Maul’s eyes were crazy and wild.
It was even creepier when he smiled.
Obi gathered his strength
As he measured the length
Between his saber, the floor and Mr. Reviled.

Maul’s last words resembled a laugh.
His cockiness proved a fatal gaffe.
With an amazing backflip
And Qui Gon’s sword in his grip,
Obi Wan sliced Darth Maul’s body in half.

Qui Gon, dying of the wound in his chest,
Pleaded with Obi a last request
“Even if it’s forbid,
You have to train that kid.”
Then at last, Qui Gon was ready for eternal rest.

Next time: Victory!
Star Wars episode I DARTH MAUL poster Phantom Menace - 11x17

Saturday, May 7, 2011

The Darkest Hour

As if Qui Gon’s defeat weren’t enough
Everywhere else, the going was rough.
With the Gungans retreating,
The queen’s chances fleeting,
And even Anakin’s situation was tough.

The Gungan’s battle shields were destroyed
And the Federation army’s tanks were deployed.
And even in retreat,
Jar Jar’s stumbling feet
Were a menace to the unwary battle droid.

The outcome on the battlefield looked bleak.
The Gungan’s found themselves up a creek.
We’ve carried out our routine,
Now I just hope the queen
Has had time now to work her technique.

In fact, the queen’s party had been caught.
A bit short of their targeted spot.
They gave up their guns
To the Viceroy’s minions
The whole plan seemed to be going for naught.

Four Neimoidians stood in a line
Their intentions were nothing benign.
“You tried and you failed,
The Federation prevailed,
Once again, queen, here’s the treaty, now sign!”

Next time: Tides Turned
Star Wars Episode 1 FAO Exclusive FAMBAA with Shield Generator and Gungan Warrior Figure

Friday, May 6, 2011

Qui Gon Jin vs. Darth Maul

Darth Maul and our two Jedi champs
Were leaping over catwalks and ramps
Obi Wan took a fall
From a kick by Darth Maul
Who into a ray shielded corridor encamps.

Qui Gon Jin on his own did give chase
After the Sith with the black and red face
The ray shield was on
And then it was gone.
And down the hallway they did race.

From the hallway Darth Maul did emerge,
Just before another ray shield surge.
Qui Gon had to wait
Just outside the gate
Before this evil Sith he could purge.

Qui Gon sat in a peaceful calm stance.
Hardly giving Maul a second glance.
The Sith stared and sneered.
Obi Wan finally appeared
At the other end of the corridor’s expanse.

When the ray shields were opened again,
Another bout for the weary swordsmen.
Obi sprinted down the hall
And past most of the ray walls
Unfortunately there were eleven, not ten.

So Qui Gon attacked one on one.
Had he waited for Obi, he might have won.
Darth Maul punched his chin
And thrust his sword in
And poor Qui Gon Jin’s fight was done!

Obi Wan looked on in anguished shock.
And waited for the door to unlock
With no time to grieve
He tried to believe
That he had himself a Sith to defrock.

Next time: The Darkest Hour
Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan and Darth Maul Continue Battle (Instrumental) mp3, $0.99 at Amazon.com

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Anakin Takes Control

In a fighter ship that flew on its own
Was a boy who was only half grown.
He drifted in the void
With his astromech droid
And their situation took a dire tone.

A ship blew up right behind them
The flash did temporarily blind them
Anakin said, “Artoo,
Could you find out if you
Can find the autopilot wires and unwind them?”

Artoo had blue lights and red
And noises that came out of his head
There’s bleeps and there’s bloops
And they come out in groups
And somehow Anakin knows what he’s said.

To the left Ani slightly nudged his stick
And his wing dipped and waved just a tick.
“Way to go Artoo!
I knew you’d come through.
Now I can steer in this hostile traffic!”

Artoo said, “Bleep Bleep Blip Blip.”
Which meant, “lets go back...end of trip”
But Ani wasn’t done,
Dog fighting was fun
“Qui Gon told me to stay in this ship!”

With the enemy hot on his tail
Ani tried to shake him to no avail.
The enemy laser spit
And Anakin was hit
Causing Artoo to beep and wail.

By the time control was regained
In the landing bay, Ani’s ship was contained
When they finally stopped,
Artoo whistled and popped,
Warning of the battle droids attention they’d attained.

Next time: Qui Gon Jin vs. Darth Maul
Star Wars - Episode 1 - Micro Machines - Trade Federation Battleship - #4 - Die Cast Metal - Galoob - Limited Edition - Collectible

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Happy Star Wars Day!

May the Fourth Be With You.










May the Fourths Be With You - mp3 at Amazon.com

The Battles Rage

Out in the battle on the plains
Binks was tangled in a droids remains
He shimmied and shook
But with each step he took
The laser fired and fried more droids brains.

The droid captain was not satisfied
With the progress achieved by his side.
The wheel droids were told
To roll in and unfold
And when they did, many Gungans died.

Up above, Ani argued with Artoo.
The autopilot they couldn’t undo.
They were headed straight for
The Federation’s core
The Command Ship that terrorized Naboo.

Down below, the Jedi fought the Sith
They were having some problems with.
Every tactic they applied,
He took it right in stride
He’d be a hard one to defeat forthwith.

Amidala and her troops were hunkered down,
In a hallway hiding from the droids they found.
So out the window they went
And made a short ascent
Straight up the wall they were throne room bound.

In the field, the battle was heated.
Overmatched, the Gungans retreated.
Jar Jar slipped and he falls
And spilt the energy balls
Which rolled down the hill and destruction meted.

Next time: Anakin Takes Control
LEGO Star Wars The Battle of Naboo $23.99 at Amazon.com

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Anakin Stays Put

Ani hid in a ship with Artoo.
And watched as the pilots of Naboo
Rose up to skies
Like a whole swarm of flies
Okay...not a swarm... but quite a few.

The queen said, “Let’s head for the throne.”
“Wait for me!” Anakin did intone.
“Anakin, stay your feet,
Keep your butt in that seat.”
Said Qui Gon, making his authority known.

The group made their way towards the hall.
They were met at the door by Darth Maul.
Protecting their neighbors
The Jedi lit their sabers
And said, “We’ll take care o’ this one, y’all.”

At the same time some battle droids rolled in.
Separating Amidala from Qui Gon Jin.
But R2D2
Knew just what to do
And started up the fighter for the win!

Anakin was learning the controls
There was blinking buttons and consoles.
With a gleeful snigger
He pulled on the trigger
And decorated the battle droids with holes.

With the Jedi engaging Darth Maul,
Amidala’s crew ran down the hall.
And out the hangar flew
Anakin and Artoo
And up to the outer space brawl.

On the ground, a swashbuckling ado,
Darth Maul’s moves were akin to Kung Fu.
He leaped and he jumped
And the Jedi were stumped
Because Maul had not one blade, but two!

Next time: The Battles Rage

Monday, May 2, 2011

War

The Gungans approached Theed head on,
Darth Maul said, “This must be a con.
They try to deceive,
There’s a trick up their sleeve,
I wouldn’t put it past a Jedi like Qui Gon.

The Viceroy said, “Shall we proceed?”
“Wipe them all out,” Sidious agreed.
So the Federation tanks
Formed up their ranks
And thus started the battle for Theed.

The Gungans started up their energy shield
Two armies faced each other cross the field.
And then the entire
Droid Army opened fire,
But the Gungan defenses didn’t yield.

Meanwhile outside Theed’s main hangar,
The Naboo, with indignant anger,
Stormed their way in
Slicing soldiers of tin
Into spare parts of disheartened languor.

The Nemoidians watched on a screen
The unfolding hangar battle scene.
“The battle’s so near!”
Said Nute, hiding fear.
Darth Maul left to go confront the Queen.

On the plain, the droid tanks ceased fire.
A new tactic they would require
The Gungans were floored
To see an infinite horde
Of robots marching down to the mire.

The droids were ordered to charge.
The Gungans eyeballs got large
They fired a shower
of balls made of power
That made the droids spark and discharge.

Next time: Anakin Stays Put

Sunday, May 1, 2011

The Battle Plan

“We’ve located the ship,” Gunray said,
To Sidious’s floating hologram head.
“Her move is too bold,
But let it unfold.
Keep an eye on her and don’t be misled.”

The Queen and her new found comrade
Wrote out battle plans on an old scratch pad.
Jar Jar practically floated
When he was promoted,
“Weesa maken you General (Bombad)!”

The plan was to draw the droids out
To the Gungan army for a direct bout.
Then a group of Naboo
Would try to sneak through
And capture Mr. Viceroy Sans Snout.

“The Gungans might take a great loss,”
Said Qui Gon, looking out across.
“We’re not faint of heart.
We will do our part.”
Said the giant Gungan named Boss.

“If we can free a few pilots en route
We could launch some small ships in pursuit.
With the control ship destroyed,
Their communication would be void,
And the battle droids wouldn’t know who to shoot.

Qui Gon said, “This plan is well thought out
But in order to bring it about
We HAVE to catch Nute,
And your fighters MUST shoot
Through the shields of the control ship, no doubt.

Next time: War